La Quimica es la Vida

I realized this while washing dishes. Because I tend to think when bored and such. And I came upon the conclusion that "Chemistry is Life". Or Life is Chemistry, not too solid on the order, but yea, you should get the drift. I am making pieces up as I write this, the original thoughts will be marked with an asterisk, or an octothorpe...

1. We're organic.

*2.# Life is a series of bonds, made with people or things, and as we go through life, those bonds get broken, but like in chemistry, bonds between molecules (people) typically don't stay broken, they form new ones, with different elements. And yes, I know that life is not as clear cut as chemistry, because you don't lose one friend and gain a stronger bond with another in the same group, so you have to think of the world as the "controlled environment" that the reaction takes place in. That way "the equation is balanced".


Seriously think about it. You're friends from elementary school, if you're lucky, and had the N[2] bond, may still be together, but highly unlikely, that first bond was broken, and replaced with those in middle school. Then another reaction took place, and you where transferred to high school. Add a reaction, and you have post high-school, whether it be the job market, or College. And the process will continue, until you die. It's great if you have an N[2] bond, because I hear that is the strongest natural bond. A triple bond, only a few bacteria can do something with it, on a reaction level that is. But that's hearsay, I did not look up that info for myself.
Yep, some of the randomness I have thought of recently. And I found out another friend goes to UNCC, but I still lack the means to play more people in Magic, or Smash. :(



-Pineapple

Gravity. Or should I talk about Coulomb Forces?

Gravity, because that's what one usually associates with something heavy on the mind, or heart. But that doesn't really apply to me, because I passed the first level of physics, so gravity is behind me, and Coulombs is the new thing. It had actually yet to hit me, probably because I escaped to State last weekend, but this weekend, home was essentially unavoidable. And, so home I stayed. Except for Friday night, when I chilled with some friends and played HALO 3 for quite a few hours. It was that, or go to a Brisingr book release, which I actually really wanted to do, but caught up in Magic: The Gathering TCG. Really fun, and another thing I wish I could do more here.
It.
Is.
Boring.
Here.
I have come to realize that I am completely not used to this, the soloness of being here. At State, I was rarely alone for more than an hour or two on a weekend, and have grown very accustomed to that lifestyle. I hate being alone, probably one of the worst things in the world for me, and today, that's what happened. I figured I would try to be productive, and get some Physics homework done, but I did not understand it, tried to read the book, and went cross-eyed, and when I thought I could be confident in an answer, it turned out to be wrong. All in all, a rather unproductive session. So, I watched about 7 episodes of Rosario + Vampire, Season one, finishing it, and am looking forward to Season 2 being subbed, as well as the manga scans. That is not a well spent day. I did go to a friends house, and chilled with some for a couple of hours, but, they are church friends. And I know I am not "fit" for their company anymore. I am a heathen, according to how I have been raised, and I am not sure I really want to not be. Which puts me at further odds with myself, because now I am unsure about post mortem consequences, which I do believe in, but am not ready to "come clean". Life rather sucks to me right now. And mistakes made in Raleigh, I have to come to terms with that, and brace for the worst case senario, which seems like it will happen, and I am scared about that, too much responsibility, yet ones I must bear. I need to do Chemistry and Biology work tomorrow, as well as secure a job soon. I want/need money for revisiting State, as well as Magic, and random outings with friends. Speaking of friends, I need help making them, I don't really know how, I think, and have to be more extroverted than I am used to being with strangers, and that is a bit intimidating. My intentions are not snow white, but mainly, I just want people to hang out with on weekends, or weekend nights... Being home constantly will drive me insane. But I guess above all of that, I need to know what the hell is going on in Physics. I don't want that class to end my college career, I am not ready for it to end.


Also, to whoever reads this series of gripes and complaints, where'd you go, from the first to this one, did the topic get too sour to stay around?


-Pineapple

How I feel.

This song describes my feelings rather well right now. Not to mention it's pretty good, and I enjoy the artist. A peek into my strange musical preferences this was.


-Pineapple

Things that dashed through my mind this morning.

In no particular order.
1. I'm a dumbass.
2. I'm a leech.
3. Doesn't saving someone from a fall also kill them?
4. I am a roach.
5. I am immature, irresponsible, and unable to make it through as I currently am.
6. Visionary Underground.
7. I need to help myself so I can help others.

Now, I suppose some of these things would require explanation, as they seem rather random, and out there.

Actually, 1 and 5 rather go together. I dinged, dented the truck I drive, and did not tell my folks about it. My mom did not notice it, but my dad, who came home recently, did, and confront me about it. I can't really deny it, and really realize, that this kind of stuff is what gets me in trouble, and I obviously have not learned my lesson. I then told my mom, and she was angry, which is what I thought I was avoiding in not telling her, but I know that she is not angry about injuring the car, but not telling her, because it is hers, and I am obligated to tell her if I have accidents with property that is not mine, as well as not be so afraid of her, and what her reaction will be, to be able to accept criticism and rebuke. That is necessary for life, and can help me be better in life.

Leech, I'm just really a bad person.

I was thinking, that, when someone is freefalling, in cartoons, and superhero shows, person is falling for some reason or another, and death is guaranteed should said person hit the ground, because all of their momentum stops, and is suddenly redirected. They are caught in a "Princess" hold, or cradled or whatever, and they are caught suddenly, and immediately go from going vertically, to going horizontally. They should die anyway, since it is a last minute save.

Being at State, kinda made me accustomed to "darkness" and now that I am at home, there is "light", going to church and all. And I am rejecting it. Inwardly, and, it probably is not good for me, but I don't really care to be here, working and doing labor and getting a lot done before 1100am on a Saturday, as well as missing chilling with friends on weekend nights.

Visionary Underground is a music group, and while cutting the grass today and listening to my iPod shuffle (1st gen.) the song Champagne & Wealth came on. It got me thinking, 1. I'm not yet living life well, and 2. Even though that may be the message of the song, you can not survive as an enlightened hobo in America.

I am not the best condition. However, I enjoy helping others, and trying to assist them with their problems, or maybe I'm just noisy. But I have a lot of problems myself, is it ok for me to try to help others, when I am so messed up myself?


-Pineapple

Adding Yeast, for Levity.

So, as of late, my blogs have been serious, and as some say, depressing. And with good reason, if you've read them, there truly is a lot going on, as well as on my mind, and, yes, I was venting, to you dear internet, because, you will take my abuse, and are an excellent way for me to get my true feelings out in a manner that would be detrimental to my existence should I do what I did in real life.
But in general, I am not at all that serious, I probably should be, but it is not really my nature, or nurture, depending upon your beliefs, or emotions at the time.

I started this one with hopes of saying something witty, or funny, but lack the "juice" to do so. I don't know what's wrong. Oh well, when something worthwhile strikes me, I'll be sure to post.


-Pineapple